My latest book: Two Legends of Uzbekistan

Posted on August 7, 2013August 7, 2013 by Paul

My newest book is out… in Uzbekistan! Two Legends of Uzbekistan is a mythology book featuring two well-known legends of the region. Special thanks to my artist collaborators, Husan Sadykov and Shavkat Muzaffar who brought the stories to life with brilliance. Chargé d’affaires Philip Kosnett presented the book during a special ceremony at the U.S. Embassy in Tashkent. The Embassy will gift the book, written in English, Russian and Uzbek, to foreign dignitaries and visiting U.S. officials as a symbol of artistic creation between the people of America and Uzebekistan. For more on the story in English, click the link.

http://www.12news.uz/en/2013/08/06/the-u-s-embassy-and-uzbek-artists-present-two-legends-of-uzbekistan/

The author and artists gather around a table covered with original artwork images from “Two Legends of Uzbekistan.”

Packing Out Is Hard To Do

Posted on April 23, 2013April 23, 2013 by Paul

“Pack out” is part and parcel of the Foreign Service experience in much the same way running into burning buildings is part of being a firefighter. It’s an essential part of the job and it’s never fun. Moving is always a hassle, moving overseas exponentially so. The State Department has been moving people around the world for a long time and folks do their best to make it as easy as possible, but transporting a household full of stuff is more organized chaos than anything else.

Halfway through the process, it’s clear that an organized and clearly labeled set of shelves gets packed quickly.

In our single FS tour over the course of about two and a half years, we had to pack out four times. Austin–>Washington, Washington–>Tashkent, Tashkent–>Tashkent (when the State Dept. was unable to renew the lease on our house), and Tashkent–>Austin (only two and a half months after the previous move). You’d think by the fourth time we’d be total pros, but as any FS or military person can tell you, every pack out is different.

You learn lessons every time, which certainly helps. On our Tashkent to Tashkent move, we didn’t think about the fact that our Sleep Number mattress would lose some air when we disconnected the hoses to the air pump that allows each of us to set the firmness for our own side of the bed. We got to the new house and had to sleep on the embassy-issued guest bed for a night until I could find the Sleep Number remote in the poorly labeled box of stuff from my nightstand. This time the remote went in my suitcase. We also organized a huge section of the basement into shelves clearly labeled for Air Freight (to arrive in a few weeks) and HHE (household effects to arrive in about three months).

Yes, we want the boxes. Please don’t accidentally pack the ginormous ladder.

However, some things are beyond our control. The language gap, for example, is always a problem on an overseas move. I appreciate the convenience of having a team of movers whose job is to pack our stuff for us, but even two people can’t see everything half a dozen guys do. Also, they’re from a foreign culture and don’t understand what some stuff is because it doesn’t exist in their country. Add to that a language gap (my Russian is okay but far from precise) and lack of familiarity with Foreign Service procedure and there are going to be problems.

I’ll skip over most of the craziness for the sake of brevity, for example, the fact that their weight estimate was off by more than 2,000 pounds, forcing us to sell our gorgeous tapchan at the last minute when, with planning, we could have sold or given away a few hundred pounds of less awesome stuff to meet our weight limit (200 pounds of overweight fees add up to more than 900 dollars). An estimate being off a bit is fine. An estimate being off by the weight of a Volkswagen ain’t “I missed that chair and a bike.”

Farewell, beloved tapchan. At least we know you’re going to a good home!

I’ll focus on one example of logistical difficulties just to give a sense of what it’s like to pack out in Uzbekistan. When they arrived, the somewhat-English-speaking supervisor introduced me to their “kitchen specialist.” His job was to pack all the fragile kitchen items while the rest of the team did their thing. Before we knew it, he had packed several things that shouldn’t have been packed (I’ve heard tales of garbage cans being packed, garbage and all, then shipped overseas or even put into storage for years.

Our kitchen “specialist” packed the two embassy owned dish-drying racks, which was really our fault for not pointing out they needed to stay with the house. We caught that quickly and he managed to retrieve them without much trouble. It was much later before we discovered he’d taken the silverware rack out of the dishwasher and boxed it up. In a city where many lack electricity, I can understand how he could make that mistake. However, we told the entire team half a dozen times that all of the electricity transformers had to stay. Their supervisor told them in Russian. Still, one ended up packed, a mistake we didn’t notice until it was deep inside the moving truck. Anyone in the U.S. want to buy a European to American power transformer that we had to buy from the embassy? No? Oh well, live and learn. Best of luck to everyone with their next move!

PaulBenjaminWrites.com World Premiere!

Posted on March 19, 2013March 19, 2013 by Paul

Welcome to PaulBenjaminWrites.com – the new web page of Paul Benjamin. I’ve streamlined things from my old web presence and added lots of new features. I’ll be posting regular updates both personal and professional here, right on my front page. Where else can you read about awesome new comic book projects and life as a diplomat in Uzbekistan? (Nowhere else on that one in particular, guaranteed!)

Thanks to my new web tools, I’ll be assigning categories to posts and tagging them as well. You’ll be able to target posts that are relevant to your interests. Prospective clients can see review projects I’ve worked on in the past. Travel lovers can read about visits to Thailand, Algeria, Prague, etc. Video game fans can hear about upcoming games like the Marvel Heroes MMO. Gluttons for punishment can learn what it’s like to live in Uzbekistan. Those who want to reach me now that I have a new email address can get in touch through my website’s Contact page.

Now I’ll be able to instantly send out my posts via Twitter and Facebook too. Soon I’ll be writing about my upcoming graphic novel The Girl With No Name. I’ll also finally be launching a page for the supermodel side of my career, so keep an eye out and enjoy my adventures!

Halloween, Half a World Away

Posted on November 15, 2012March 18, 2013 by Paul

Just because we’re living on the other side of the planet, doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate Halloween in style. Every year the embassy puts on a big Halloween party for local and American staff and their families. There are trick-or-treat booths, music, food, a costume contest and a bouncy castle. My own involvement as a volunteer comes with helping organize the haunted house!

Though we have a limited budget and materials (further complicated by the need to wait 3 weeks for anything ordered from the U.S. that might have been forgotten), the folks from the CLO (Community Liaison Office) and local volunteers always come together to put on a great haunted house!

I don’t have many photos since the area is dark and I was busy being scary, but I do have a few. Last year, the storage cage in the warehouse was home to a werewolf.

This year that space housed a mad scientist and his monster (not pictured).

My role last year was as a victim.

Yes, I know that my shoes don’t match. I suppose I was actually a “fashion” victim…

This year, after folks made their way through the graveyard and its zombies…

… they entered a vampire nest. Only Van Helsingberg, Jewish Vampire Hunter, could protect them!

(Once the people got past the vampires, the vamps killed me. I guess I should’ve stuck to writing about monsters instead of fighting them.)

And finally, here’s the winner of the costume contest, our very own Queen of the Nile!

I hope everyone had as great a Halloween 2012 as I did. Next year, I’ll be celebrating it in America!

Hmmm… we never did figure out what happened to my other leg after last year’s haunted house…

My New Jobs (Not The Ones I Expected)

Posted on September 14, 2012March 18, 2013 by Paul

Just in time for Rosh Hashana (the Jewish New Year) and my last year in Uzbekistan, big changes are afoot!

In my last post, I mentioned that I was interviewing for a job that opened up at the embassy after the previous job owner left for her next assignment. The Public Affairs Assistant position was a perfect fit for me. I interviewed and the folks at the embassy agreed. After all, who could be more qualified to write for the embassy’s website than the resident supermodel? Unfortunately, someone in Washington who doesn’t know me or Lisa decided that it would be a violation of nepotism policy for me to work so closely with my wife. As a result, I can’t take that job and it remains unfilled.

Of course, I understand the need for nepotism policies. It wouldn’t be appropriate for my wife to be my direct supervisor. This is frustrating because I happen to know a husband and wife who had these exact same two jobs at this exact same embassy four years ago. It was okay for them to work together, but with the Foreign Service shuffling jobs every few years, whoever had to make the nepotism decision this time put the kibosh on the job for me. As a result, the embassy doesn’t simply have a less-qualified person in the PA Assistant job. It’s just empty. That means more work for everyone in the PA section.

So, what’s this about my new job? Well, the embassy hired me as a temp (in FS terms: a “When Actually Employed” position). As such, I’ll be a floater, helping out wherever I can with whatever projects I can. Guess who really needs my help right now? The Public Affairs section because they lack a PA Assistant.

I doubt I’ll be doing the exact same job. It wouldn’t be kosher to use this position as a workaround for the nepotism policy. However, I’ll definitely be doing some of the work I’d have done as the PA Assistant since there’s nobody to do it right now. Plus, I’ll be doing it for less pay and with none of the benefits or vacation/sick leave I’d have accrued as a PA Assistant. Am I annoyed? A little bit. However, I’ve never taken a job I didn’t plan to do to the best of my ability. I start Monday and I plan to jump in and do what I can to help the mission. It means money I can use to hire an artist plus it’ll help out my friends at the embassy.

Another big change for this final year in Uzbekistan is that I just got the rights back to one of my Tokyopop properties!! It’s a manga book I was doing with the stunningly talented artist Eden Benton before Tokyopop folded. She’s done a significant amount of work on the book and I’ve already scripted it, so this is a big win for us. Right now we’re exploring a Kickstarter.com campaign to raise money for producing the book. When that kicks off, I promise you’ll hear all about it as I look for your support in this new endeavor! Happy New Year!

One Year Later

Posted on August 9, 2012March 18, 2013 by Paul

Here I am at the one-year mark. One year in Tashkent, Uzbekistan.

It’s been an interesting year and now that I’ve lived here for a while I’m feeling pretty much over all the wide-eyed wonder. I’ve heard that folks in the Foreign Service tend to go through several phases when living overseas. At first they’re overwhelmed and excited to be in a foreign culture. After a while, they get used to it but still appreciate all the differences. Later, however, there’s a bit of a trough in the pleasure graph: a point at which living overseas begins to lose its luster.

After three weeks back in the states (with a side trip to London), that’s pretty much where I am now. I’ve been back home where I ate at my favorite restaurants and saw beloved friends and family. I was in LA, at San Diego Comic Con, visiting family in Las Vegas and enjoying New York. We spent nearly a week in Austin, constantly wondering why we ever left in the first place. Even the simple things, like being able to walk into a store and buy something with a credit card instead of a stack of bills as tall as my water bottle served to remind me of what I’m missing. Now I look around and it’s hard not to focus on the crumbling streets and lawless driving or the large packs of police everywhere you turn. I still enjoy walking to the local bazaar for fresh food straight from the fields, but I’m really missing home.

All this tells me that it’s time for a change. I have several projects fully scripted and it’s time to put up or shut up. One now has an artist attached, someone I’ve worked with before and was dying to work with again. The other two need illustrators to move forward, so now I’m looking around, trying to find that perfect partner for each story.

Another big change comes as one of the embassy spouses leaves with her husband for their next post. That opened up a part-time job in the embassy: the job I’ve had my eye on since I came to Uzbekistan. The job is a Public Affairs Assistant position writing articles for the embassy’s website. Hmmm… writing articles every day? Proofreading content? Managing social media outreach? Yeah, I’m just a little familiar with those things as a writer, editor and, of course, supermodel.

The catch, of course, is that I’d be working in the same department as my wife. I know I’m fine with that and she’s fine with that, but even if the interviewers choose me for the job, we have to wait and see if the U.S. State Department is fine with that. Basically, the HR department has to ask someone in Washington who doesn’t know us whether it’s okay for Lisa and I to work together. Normally the job owner would report to her position, but the folks here would change it so that I officially report to Lisa’s boss instead.

If I do get the job, it’s around 20 hours a week, leaving me plenty of time to continue my personal projects. The big advantage is that the money I would earn for the job is gravy since Lisa already earns enough to pay our bills. It’s not a big paycheck, being a civil servant assistant position (and part-time at that) but it will be all mine to spend on artists for my projects. Being able to pay an artist goes a loooong way when it comes to finding a pro who can do the job right.

Whether I land the job or not, I’m looking at our next year in Uzbekistan with an eye towards making a change. It’s time to get these projects off the ground and share my stories with fans who love comics as much as I do. Then, after another year here, it’s back to Washington for Spanish language training, followed by two years in Mexico City! I’m very excited about the new post. More on that later.

Next Year in Uzbekistan!

Posted on April 8, 2012March 18, 2013 by Paul

Hello, friends and a happy Passover/Easter/Pagan Spring to you all. How does one celebrate Passover in Uzbekistan? Well, this is my first one so I can’t be sure how it’s been done in previous years. However, I can tell you that we certainly had a great first one!

A group of the Jews and tangental Jews (those who aren’t so religious or married into the Tribe or just spent many years assigned to Israel) from the American Embassy got together at the home of our Deputy Chief of Mission (2nd in command to the Ambassador) for the Seder dinner. For those who don’t know much about Judaism, you may have heard of the Last Supper. That little dinner soiree of Jesus and his pals (and Judas) (and Mel Brooks as the waiter if you worship History of the World Part 1 like I do) was a Seder: the Passover religious service/dinner party. Essentially, we Jews get together to retell the story of how our ancestors escaped from Egypt thanks to Moses and his sea-parting super powers, during which tale we drink a lot of wine and then eat stuff on weird crackers.

I was going to post a pic of the group, then I remembered that we’re not supposed to do that without everyone’s permission due to security policies. You’ll just have to content yourselves with a pic of me and my lovely bride.

Our delicious dinner spread included a Seder plate for each person rather than one big one at the center. The Seder plate has a variety of items that represent elements of the story of the Exodus from Egypt. You’ve got the green vegetable (usually celery or lettuce) to represent Spring (I have no idea what they do in the Southern hemisphere where this holiday is celebrated when it’s not Spring) while the salt water you dip it in represents the tears our ancestors cried as slaves. The bitter herb (horseradish) is for the bitterness of slavery while the egg is both a symbol of mourning from long ago and a symbol of rebirth.

Then there’s the mixture of apples, wine and nuts that stands in for the mortar used to build the pyramids and the matzoh. The matzoh isn’t just a big flat cracker, it’s a reminder of the fact that when our ancestors fled, they didn’t have time to let the bread rise. If you look at the pic to the right, you’ll see the homemade matzoh from the DCM’s cook. It’s the best matzoh I’ve ever had! If you’re keeping Passover and avoiding leavened break this week, I highly recommend finding a recipe online and making your own. Yum!

I don’t have a photo of the matzoh ball soup or the gifelte fish, but I have to say that homemade gifelte fish is another tasty treat. Eating the stuff out of the jar is something that if you do it, it’s grudgingly and only once a year. At least, that’s my experience. The fish our host’s cook made has been a delectable addition to the list of leftovers this year.

Below are the main courses. There’s chicken with tzimmes (a mixture of sweet potatoes and dried fruits roasted with the meat), roasted lamb (not pictured), potatoes, spinach pie, and apple-matzoh kugel.

Mmmmm… homemade matzoh….

For dessert, we had Lisa’s Passover Pecan Bars, which are exactly what they sound like only made with matzoh meal instead pastry crust. She also make the flourless chocolate cake dubbed “Jace’s Cake” many years ago when it became the favorite of one of our friends in Los Angeles with whom we regularly shared Seder.

And finally, one of our friends from the embassy make Chocolate Crispy Cookies! You may recognize these as the crispy-on-the-outside/gooey-on-the-inside cookies available at Central Market stores all over Texas. Lisa searched for this recipe for years before finally stumbling across an excellent one in the New York Times Jewish Cookbook. Our friend’s came out perfectly!

As always, the Seder ended with the traditional prayer that next year we Jews might all be gathered together in the holy land, “Next year in Jerusalem!”

Only we know how long our tour will be, so for us, it’s “Next year in Uzbekistan!”

Thailand That I Love – part 4 – Two Nights in Bangkok

Posted on March 10, 2012March 18, 2013 by Paul

I started writing this post months ago, then dusted it off right after getting back from three weeks in London that was supposed to be one week. Now, before I get to our London trip, I feel the need to finish off my posts on Thailand, given that we returned from there way back at the end of January!

I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not blogging as regularly as I’d like. It’s just hard to justify the time when I could be spending it writing actual comics or working on my novel. However, though I may be slow, I remain commited to recording our time in this crazy Foreign Service life. I suppose it says something about how much we’re travelling that I can’t keep up with recording all our trips. Since this January trip to Thailand, we’ve been to London, Bukhara, and Issyk-Kul Lake in Kyrgyzstan. In addition, I still haven’t written about our trips to Vienna and Prague back in December.

On the one hand, it’s exciting that this new phase in our life means we get to take lots of opportunity for travel. On the other hand, it’s an indicator of just how stir crazy we’re getting in Tashkent. There are some things we’re really enjoying about Uzbekistan, such as the people in the embassy community, shopping for fresh food at the bazaar, and the bread from our neighborhood backyard bakery.

However, life outside our lovely home is usually inconvenient at best, frustrating at the worst. There are social and political challenges to living in a police state where you are clearly different from everyone else on the street. We’re isolated physically from family and friends back in the states and our home Internet has a tendency to go down frequently. We’re isolated socially because it’s tough to make friends outside of the small embassy community. We’ve mostly given up on eating out because neither we nor any of our friends have found any restaurants so good that we end up craving more. I could name off the top of my head a dozen restaurants I’d love to visit again in the states or in other countries. Though I keep trying, the food and ambience in restaurants here just isn’t good enough to leave me dying for more.

We’re travelling a lot, but it’s expensive and difficult to get out of the country. If you think U.S. airlines and airports are a hassle, try flying Uzbekistan Airways out of Tashkent airport. Maybe I’ll get into these challenges more in a future post. For now, let’s just say that right now we’re in one of the valleys of enjoying our post and it’s nice to get out and see the world… or even to remember having done so six months ago!

How’s that for a transition?

Overall, Bangkok is not a place we’re looking forward to visiting again. It was nice to see it once, but it’s too big, crowded and dirty for our tastes. Next time we visit Thailand (there will almost certainly be a next time), Bangkok will just be the city we fly into before jumping on another plane or into a car so that we can head to our real destination.

However, that didn’t stop us from having some wonderful experiences while we were there. Our first day, we headed straight to the famous Chatuchak Market for some shopping. We entered through a labyrinth of shops in a huge indoor space. Each shop is just a stall, many separated only by cloth, but the partitions reach high enough to make you feel boxed in as you try to get through the crowds, occassionally stopping to check out something interesting. It’s a huge space that, as far as I could tell, covers several city blocks. Just about everything you could imagine is for sale there, from the mundanity of clothing to the unusual, such as pets.

When we finally reached the open air part of the market (I’m sure there are different entrances that go straight there), we found a delight of various foods available in addition to the shopping stalls. Below are pics of, on the left, a woman making coconut ice cream served inside the coconut shells. On the right are grilled squids.

Thought we didn’t buy a lot, Lisa did get a couple of cute blouses from this stall on the left. After a satisfying Thai seafood lunch, we also fell victim to the delicious smell of fried chicken breast at one of the stalls.

Later, we decided to take a break and have a few drinks when we saw this cute little bar stall complete with a DJ. It’s tough to tell from the photo on the right, but the DJ’s turntable stand is actually made from discarded weapons crates, each one idicating what kinds of guns or grenades the box used to contain. It’s nice to see them turned from objects of violence to providing the pleasure of music. Our stay in the bar was perfectly timed, just before the afternoon rainstorm.

After a night in our hotel, we hopped on a boat the next day that took us and a hundred other passengers down the river. When we exited, we headed past one of the many shrines where religious leaders chanted prayers.

After passing the lovely shrine, we did our best to find the right bus to take us to a mall where we could buy Lisa a new cell phone to replace the one she lost at the beginning of our trip. Thirty minutes later, overcome by crowds, traffic, and our inability to find the correct mode of transportation, we decided to give it up and buy a new phone in Tashkent. Instead, we hopped on a private longtail boat for a tour of Bangkok’s canals. As we went along the length of the river, we spotted our first dragon! Okay, really it’s a big lizard, but you can mostly see it camoflaged to the right along the canal’s concrete wall. Over the course of the tour we saw two more, some of them just wandering through folks’ backyards! I imagined how our dogs would react to such an invasion in our own backyard, leaving me wondering who would win in that fight. Hopefully we’ll never know.

One of the most interesting things about the canals is the variety of dwellings jutting out over the water. Some are dilapidated and run down, others are quite fancy with their own backyards.

Some folks took advantage of their decks for diving and swimming, though I imagine the dirty water isn’t without its health risks. It was also fun to see people getting around on their own boats, or out cleaning them like a 1950s man washing his car in the driveway of his suburban home.

Several yards came complete with their own personal shrines. This family has a large yard and a lovely one on display for anyone on the channel to see.

Our tour also took us to one of Bangkok’s floating markets: a series of boats along a floating pier, selling delicious foods of all kinds.

We were so stuffed at this point that we didn’t eat much at the floating market. However, we did stop for some of the sweet pastries at the stall pictured in the middle here. Yum!! Also, we saw a big temple from the boat as we headed back home. Anyone who can identify it gets extra points! (No, of course I’m not turning it into a contest because I can’t remember which temple it is. That’s a ridiculous suggestion!)

And when we finally returned from our visit to a tropical paradise, what did we find waiting for us in our yard?

Yeah, that probably would’ve had more impact if I’d actually posted this back in the winter when it really happened…

Happy 2012 and Flashback 2011: Secretary Clinton

Posted on January 1, 2012March 19, 2013 by Paul

Merry New Year!! Beef Jerky time!

If you don’t get that reference, then you haven’t seen Trading Places often enough. Go watch it while the holidays are still fresh. You’ll thank me later.

In the meantime, I’m looking forward to what I hope will be an incredible new year and I wish the same for all of my readers. I’d been feeling like I hadn’t accomplished much in 2011 until I wrote a Facebook post and realized just how much I’d done. This year I learned to speak Russian (some), moved to Uzbekistan, traveled to Algiers, Vienna and Prague, did cool things in comics (Spider-Man) and in video games (Star Wars and Marvel MMOs) and shared the adventure, as always, with the incredible Lisa Goodgame. I’ll be doing my best to top that in 2012!

On the professional side, I’m hoping that my time in 2011 was well spent. I’m nearly finished with a 140-page graphic novel that I’ve written on spec. That is, I wrote it speculatively, hoping that I’ll be able to find an artist and publisher once it’s ready. I’ll be sending it to a few trusted individuals for notes in the next few weeks and then after tweaking I’ll give it to an agent for consideration. I’m also on page 145 of a graphic novel I’ve been writing using the “page a day” method. I write one page every day, never more, never less. That guarantees some kind of progress on a project that might not get done otherwise. Once I bring that extremely rough draft to a conclusion, I’ll set it aside for a time and then come back to it so that I can see what, if anything, I can salvage to then write an actual script.

I also just wrote an 8-page short story for a secret project that could lead to some work-for-hire freelance work. Plus I’m editing an indy comic called Forgotten City about which you’ll be hearing more in the coming days. There’s a few other projects on the horizon as well, but nothing solid enough to mention here just yet.

On the personal side, we’re currently planning a trip to Thailand in mid-January so that we can visit our good friend Noelle from our L.A. days and in July we’re planning to take an R&R in the U.S., probably starting with San Diego so that I can swing by Comic Con. I’m also hoping for a visit from my mom and some of her friends, and maybe one of my cousins as well. Beyond that, who knows where Lisa and I will end up going?Given their proximity and realtively easy/less expensive flight options, hopefully we’ll pop over to Russia, India and Turkey this year. That is, if Lisa can get away from work. Which brings us to…

FLASHBACK 2011

From time to time I’ll be writing entries under the above title so that I can fill in some missing gaps in my tales of 2011, such as Halloween in Tashkent, our first Marine Ball, and more on our trips to Vienna and Prague. For now, here’s a tidbit I call:

SECRETARY’S DAY (MORE LIKE TWO WEEKS)

When Lisa and her colleagues learned that Secretary of State Clinton would be visiting Tashkent back in October, it set off a flurry of activity. Many Foreign Service folks told us that Tashkent would be a realatively quiet post, but that hasn’t been the case at all. Tashkent has been getting a lot of attention from Washington lately and with the current troubles in Pakistan shutting down American routes in and out of Afghanistan, Uzbekistan’s overland route has become more important than ever. Add to that attempts to improve our relationship in terms of fighting drug trafficking, economic development and more, all while negotiating senstive political issues, and things won’t be quieting down here anytime soon.

For several weeks in advance of the high-level visit, Lisa and everyone else at the embassy was working late to get ready. These visits take a lot of preparation. As the point person in charge of all of the Secretary’s interactions with the media, Lisa had a lot of challenges. For example, she had to make sure the hotel had enough Internet bandwidth to handle all of the data feeds for Hillary to appear on a half a dozen different shows on every major U.S. cable news and network news station. I don’t think there’s a single T-1 line in all of Uzbekistan, so adding new Internet capabilities to the hotel on short notice was no small task.

Though Lisa was in the room with the Secretary for the entire interview session, because Hillary was a whirlwind of activity rushing into and out of the room before and after the interviews, Lisa never actually got an introduction. However, after the interviews, while Lisa continued dealing with the Press, Secretary Clinton swung by the embassy on her way to other meetings. After giving an eloquent speech, she came down the line (marked on the floor with tape) shaking hands. Here’s a shot of when we met, moments before she said, “Wow, you’re the Paul Benjamin! Will you autograph my copy of Pantheon High?” She then gave me a fist bump before moving on down the line. *

* It may not have happened exactly like that.

Happy New Year, everyone!!!

I Was a Diplomatic Housewife

Posted on December 15, 2011March 18, 2013 by Paul

Okay, I’ll admit it. That Algeria post is a monster. That really should have been about four different posts. From now on, I’ll endeavor to post shorter pieces with greater frequency.

That means you’ll have to wait to see photos from Halloween, Thansgiving, and an Uzbek wedding, as well as pics from our recent trips to Vienna and Prague. Instead, I’m going to hit you with my first time as a diplomatic spouse in an official entertaining capacity.

Last night we had a party for local press at our home. Normally this would be done at Lisa’s boss’ house, but we have a better space for entertaining, so we invited around 75 Uzbeks over to our place. My diplomatic spouse responsibilities began around 11:30 AM as I tidied up the place. At 1 PM, one of Lisa’s colleagues came by and dropped off all the food. She couldn’t stay because there was another press conference she needed to run, so it was up to me to cut up shishkabobed meat into chunks, remove skewers from samsas (savory stuffed pastries), and cut up a bunch of loaves of the local, round lepyoshka bread. I left the bread for last thinking that would be easy, but after the drive over in frigid air, I needed Wolverine’s adamantium claws to cut that stuff! (Next time I’m going to nuke each one for a few seconds before I get out the bread knife.) Later, a team from the embassy arrived with tables, plates, glasses and such. The set everything up and then Lisa and another colleague arrived to do the actual decorating. When 6 PM rolled around, we had a throng of reporters waiting outside the gate for security screening. Lisa and I opened the gate and it was like a teenager’s party from a movie, where everyone arrives all at once. I shouted out one of my favorite Bill Murray lines from Stripes “A surprise party? For me? You guys!” It probably would’ve landed better if more of the reporters had seen Stripes. spoke English. Or, y’know, spoke English.

Here’s a shot from before the crowd flooded in. I wonder what they thought about the video game plaques and my comic book covers hanging from the wall.

When I hear stories about diplomats’ wives entertaining at their homes, I get a distinct image in my head of what that looks like. Sorry to disappoint, but I wasn’t wearing a 1960s cocktail dress with my hair up in a beehive. I don’t have any pics of myself at the party, so you’re just going to have to take my word for it.

I do, however, have this photo of the official backdrop from the embassy, right next to my toy display case full of battling action figures.

I can’t show pictures of the crowd since the embassy would have to get permission from each individual, but I can show the Ambassador making official remarks. I’m pretty sure this is the first time Galactus, devourer of worlds was involved in an official U.S. diplomatic event.

Yes, fellow geeks, that middle shelf is indeed a recreation of John Byrne’s classic cover from Fantastic Four #243 with “Everyone versus Galactus!” The top shelf is Magneto and the X-Men fighting a giant Sentinel robot and the bottom shelf is a Lord of the Rings tableau.

After the press left, it was time to clean up. Those of you who favor budget cuts will be glad to know that there was no hired help to wash up afterwards. Even the Ambassador pitched in for the clean up effort. Thanks a lot, Congress!